It was a wet day. This barge casino had sunk to the bottom of the water. Dirk and I were the only two Ponies with the balls to take a swim-water breathing magic and dolphin rides (the rides didn’t fare so well). I used to fight in water. The Magnamar coliseum would routinely be flooded so the gladiators could slug it out with aquatic baddies, so I wasn’t skeered. Besides, wanted to test out the new beast totem claws (#Wolverine/Tasmanian Devil), so I left my shiny new shit with the krewe. Dirk and I rode the dolphins down and in the darkness. We found the barge. Then, the biggest baddest albino garfish you ever saw tried to eat us . . . it did eat us. It swallowed me first. I wasn’t about to end this adventure as guppy food. I went apeshit. In a whirlwind of claws, I was able to rip an exit from down the gullet. This didn’t set well with the gar, so it bit both of our dolphins in half and then swallowed Dirk, my waffle connection. It took a pass or two to get a hold of the slippery f#$%, but when I finally did, I remembered a finishing move from the coliseum. Didn’t think it would work on a fish this big, but I took a lucky shot anyway, punched through an eye socket and pulled fish brains out in an explosion of gore. It was one of my better moves. Grabbed Dirk through the hole in the Gar’s gullet and swam for the surface. Dirk wasn’t in the best of shape, so I helped him get to shore. This is a story for the wall of the Hag Fish.